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by Sabrina Summerfrield

No, we’re not talking about doing away with the old man, or the old woman, and living happily ever after probate! With that understood, let us consider the other options. In this field there are millions of “experts” or none at all, but there are a few simple things you can learn about how to survive a cheating spouse.

You are not alone. This could be the most important part of the survival process. Secondly, know that it’s not all about you. Your spouse may not be doing this just because of you or to hurt you. Infidelity comes about for many different reasons and you aren’t necessarily any of those reasons. The breakdown of communication in a marriage is often a big factor, but this isn’t only about you.

At this point you are no longer in doubt about the fact of the matter. You know that your spouse is or has been cheating on you. If you can keep things in perspective, you will realize that this is probably not a good guy-bad guy scenario. Granted, you are the “wronged” party, but you must be able to listen and hear the other side of the story.

You may not be able to “sit down and talk about it” with your spouse, and it may not even be a good idea to do so. Depending on how far things have gone - in this case the affair and the underlying causes of it - a clean and final break may be the best way for you to deal with the situation. This does not mean parting in bitterness or hostility; it means accepting the facts and moving on. I hope you’re learning how to survive a cheating spouse.

How you cope with what certainly appears to be a betrayal of trust and a nasty blow to your ego has everything to do with your own attitude and very little to do with “cheating” If you have been honest with yourself, not trying to deny any responsibility or lay all the blame on your spouse, you’re dealing from a position of strength. You’re in possession of all the facts, and the steps you take will be much more likely to land you safely on the other side of this crisis.

The important thing to remember is that your happiness should not be tied up in another person. Your identity should not revolve around another person. You need to be your own person, your own strength, and your own source of happiness. Once you learn this, you will successfully get past a cheating spouse and be better for it! So I hope you learned about how to survive a cheating spouse!

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Tags: Relationship Advice

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