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by Tyler Paxon Ph.D.

There are many ways to flirt with girls, but they all fall into three main categories.

You can take the initiative and just say something flirty.

You can wait for them to do something or say something that you have a pre-planned response for.

And you can bait them into doing something that will set up one of your pre-planned responses.

Now, let’s look at some specific ways you can do these things:

PROACTIVE FLIRTING: This is when you initiate some flirtatious behavior or banter. You might bump into her, or look at her funny, or call her a silly name, or make a playfully arrogant statement about yourself. Active flirting can be very effective, if she’s in a receptive frame of mind.

TRIGGERED FLIRTING: Triggered flirting can be even better than proactive flirting, because it appears more spontaneous and less planned. For instance, suppose she brags about herself. You could say, “That’s impressive. You’ve just earned 5 more minutes with me.” Reactive flirting can signal that you’re quick witted and ingelligent. And, of course, it doesn’t actually have to be spontaneous. You might have dozens of responses ready for common things girls say or do. It just has to look spontaneous to be effective.

SET-UP FLIRTING: Of course, if you want to look spontaneous, and you don’t want to wait for a girl to say or do something you have a pre-planned response for, you can always bait her into doing something that will set up a flirty response. For instance, you could bait her into bragging about herself by asking her a question like “so, what makes you so special?” Then let her brag. And then hit her with your pre-planned bragging banter line.

Those are three great ways to engage a woman in playful banter. You can read more about all of them in the “Flirting Deconstructed”.

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