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When you break up with someone you love, and it’s the other person who decided that it was time to end the relationship, you can be pretty seriously broken up about it. Luckily, life doesn’t have to end without your ex, and honestly it doesn’t even have to BE without your ex!

That’s right, you can get your ex back, and I’m here to tell you of four concrete, real things that you can do to make it easier!

1) Get out of the house, and have some fun! Going out with friends in spite of troubles like this can really help your entire world, relaxing you and getting your life back on track. Even if you don’t feel like it’s even possible to have a good time at a time like this, do your best to have fun anyways!

Why is this helpful for getting your ex back? Well, it shows that you’re not crippled by the loss, even if you may feel it inside. It creates a strong, admirable image that actually becomes pretty attractive. You’re never more attractive than when you’re getting along just fine, and that definitely works to your advantage when you’re trying to draw your ex’s eye again.

2) Analyze your past relationships, including the one that just ended. This is the part that seems so boring and pointless, but it’s actually pretty important. You need to see what sorts of problems your relationships have had, particularly the one with the ex you’re trying to win back. Once you can identify the problems in them, you can figure out which problems are of your doing.

And don’t be naive, some of the problems ARE going to be of your own doing. You may not like to hear that, but it’s likely true. Remember, your ex dumped you, not the other way around. That means that his or her needs weren’t being met, whether that means you weren’t being emotionally supportive enough or that you were too controlling and bossy. Whatever problems you’re responsible for, work on fixing yourself so that you don’t cause them anymore. Even if it doesn’t land you a new start with your ex, it’ll make your future relationships a lot better.

3) Don’t let yourself slip on the side of physical appearance and hygiene. When people fall to pieces over a breakup and spend their days slumped in their sofas sobbing into a gallon-bucket of ice cream, it tends to show on their midsections…and that’s not attractive, and not likely to get your ex back. Keep in shape, at least as good as you were when you broke up. It’s far more appealing than the alternative.

4) Top #1 most important thing (even though I’m listing it at number 4) is to make sure that you go about the “plan of attack” very subtly and stealthily. I don’t mean stalk the poor person, but take things slowly and smooth-like. First off is to not even talk to the person for a little while, just give your ex some space. Chances are, it’ll be appreciated because you’re not exactly the first person he or she wants to talk to right this moment.

Initiating contact once more should be a delicate process as well. Keep it as light and nonthreatening as possible, usually no more than a simple phone call or email. No relationship talk, just a friendly “how have you been?” is appropriate. It’s not likely to cause a lot of suspicion or stress just to see how your ex is doing, and it’s a point from which you can work up until you two are spending time with each other again.

When you get this far, you still need to watch how you move. Try to continue to keep it as nonthreatening as possible. Honestly, at this point all you’re really concerned with is showing how much you’ve worked on making yourself a better person, and having a good time with your ex. Do things the pair of you always enjoyed, as they’ll help to revive fond memories. Enough good time together and your ex should start to understand that the breakup wasn’t necessarily the best idea, and he or she will likely work on fixing that particular mistake him or herself.

I can’t guarantee your specific situation will fit easily into the space I’ve mapped out for it, but that’s going to happen when every relationship is made up of two completely unique people…but I can tell you that these guidelines I’ve given you will help you in any situation. At least keep them in mind as a way of thinking, and you’ll have a much better chance of getting your ex back.

Tags: Romance Tips

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